Sunday, August 24, 2008

There's a Lot More to Life Than Being Really, Really, Ridiculously Good Looking - Part 3

Standing in front of my closet, I was weighing out the options. Ironic or classic? These were really my only two choices. Though I enjoy following fashion and watching trends, I suck at pretending I care enough to buy a new necklace every time Forever 21 decides boho chic is in or out again. Plus, my overwhelming desire to look like I dropped out of a Rogers and Hammerstein piece tends to color my ability to fit into fashion’s social norms.

I had my outfit for the big ANTM tryout narrowed down to two equally offbeat dresses. One was a black velvet and gold lamé tulle explosion from the early Madonna years, and the other was a retro 1950’s garden-party inspired dress also in black, and adorned with small white polka dots. Ironic or classic? After hopping in and out of each dress a few times, painstakingly looking at them in both the bedroom full length mirror and the smaller bathroom mirror (each providing not only different views, but also different light), I chose the garden party dress. Over mutterings from the boyfriend reminding me that I was doing this just for fun, I matter-of-factly explained to myself that, really, velvet is more of an evening look, and this tryout was at 2 o’clock in the afternoon – the perfect time for a 50’s style back yard tea.

Did I over think the outfit? Oh surely, yes. But considering my being brainwashed by the survey I filled out the night before, it added up. I made the firm decision that my clever responses to their application would not be enough to seal the deal. In order to take reality TV by storm, I had to have a classic, yet edgy look to catch their eye. The dress took care of the classic, and I was counting on my platinum locks and tendency to overdose on black mascara to cover the edgy aspect.

In red patent leather peep-toed heals, I clumsily practiced my runway walk for the boyfriend and the non-trying-out-yet-attending-for-moral-support friend before we hit the road. I greedily soaked in the compliments they gave adding further to my delusions of grandeur. Before I pranced out to pick up the other friend who was trying-out, the boyfriend tried to give me some sage advice about keeping things in perspective. Or something like that, it was hard to hear him over my inner self who was boisterously singing my praises. This is going to be a cake-walk I told myself. I am going to stand out from every lame sequined tank top girl that shows up. I am a beautiful and unique snowflake. My inner Tyler Durden frowned. I was going to win fame, success, and happiness. No one can compete with a retro 1950’s garden party inspired dress. Nothing can stop me now.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Way to Go Joe!

The text message arrived at 3:41 am this morning confirming that Joe Biden is indeed Barack Obama's running mate for Vice President!

So if you'll notice the blog directly below this one, uh yeah, I totally called that. Cnn should probably hire me as senior political analyst now.

Also this weeks convention looks like it will be very pro-woman rights according to NOW president Kim Gandy. With Joe Biden championing ending violence against women, what I believe is the biggest issue affecting women and girls, I think this administration has a chance to create a huge positive step in the right direction for women's rights. We may have lost Hillary, but I don't think women have lost their voice.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Top 10 Reasons Why Joe Biden Would be the Most Awesomest Choice for Vice President

10) He was born in Scranton Pennsylvania, thus I assume he is a rabid fan of "The Office"

9) He saves our resources and air quality by commuting by train from Delaware to DC

8) We share the same birthday (that means once he moves down here we could totally have a joint party!)

7) He is a strong supporter of gun control, receiving a "F" rating from the NRA

6) His experience with foreign relations, coupled with his moderate stance on the Iraq War will help to win over the middle of the road democrats and republicans who view Obama as too liberal

5) Opposes jerky things like capital punishment, oiling drilling, and throwing illegal immigrants out by their coat tails

4) He has a working class background, and is outspoken as well as knowledgeable about the importance of agriculture and family farms - two qualities that make Ohioans swoon

3) He's excellent on civil rights, from combating discrimnation based on sexual orientation to working to end the wage bias against women, Biden has a long history of speaking out against injustice

2) He openly called "Bullshit!" on Bush, thus solidifying Biden's new title: Senator Badass

-And most importantly to me-

1) Senator Biden wrote the ground-breaking Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) in the 1990s that set the national agenda on criminalizing violence against women and holding batterers truly accountable.

Biden has changed the country and millions of lives for the better with this act. This along with a 100% score from NARAL, proves to every woman who is still skeptical about the ousting of Hillary that this will finally be an administration that values women. We wanted a feminist, and whether or not he identifies as such, we're getting one with Joe Biden.

I love you, Joe! Good Luck!

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Women Can Make Their Own Choices? Whaaaaa?

First off, I whole heartedly agreed with my friend when she sent me this link and said, "The love hate relationship with Jezebel continues..." Jezebel has often left a bad taste in my mouth because they seem to not be able to decide if they're into feminism or if they're the kinda chicks who think it's hilarious to rag on other women for making dumb girly choices that no self respecting chica should, a la Female Chauvinist Pigs style.

This time, however, they have definitely touched on a topic that needs more publication and acceptance, to birth or not to birth. AKA Being content fulfilling your womanly duty to the world, or becoming a dried up, cat toting pariah. In this story, the 24 year old woman who chooses to get sterilized finds there is not a happy middle ground for those of us who don't see a "Baby on Board" sign hanging in our future-mobiles.

Honestly, I'm not totally into the mommy thing (mostly because I love spending my money on things like fancy organic food and make-up instead of children), but that's cool because I'm totally accepting and supporting of those who love the pitter patter of little feet. However, I also like to trust and encourage those who aren't looking to fill the world with more unwanted, neglected kids. Additionally, I expect others to also trust women to make decisions that are right for them and their bodies (silly me).

So, why does this woman have to catch so much heat for opting for sterilization? Her mother actually cried when she found out. Cried! A lot of the issue seems to be around her age, but since when is 24 considered too young to make life decisions? If at 24 people can make the life-altering choice to join the armed forces; go to undergrad, graduate, medical, or law school; get a tattoo of a Looney Tunes character; get hitched; or pop out as many rugrats as a uterus will allow, can't we also decide to get sterilized?

Well eff that. We woman are going to birth children if we want them, or we're going to have lots worry-free pleasure focused sex just for fun, or we'll do both because we know better than anyone else what's best for us! Most importantly, we don't become useless when we don't have kids. It's time to get used to that. In the mean time, keep the tears for all the kids that have been born, yet are mistreated, unloved, and forgotten...there's a lot of them and we don't need anymore.

Thanks to Lisa for the link!